Relationships are not all happy or full of bliss. This we all know. Due to various differences that occur between you and your partner, a fight is often bound to ensue. But how do you take care of disagreements? Compose yourself during fights?. In most relationships, the end result of actions taken during such times usually takes a turn downwards in respect to various partnerships. Below are 4 DO AND DON'TS WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELVES IN A FIGHT
DO....
1.Listen and respect
Do pay attention to your partner’s
position, no matter how strongly you
believe you’re right. A fair fight is one
in which both parties have equal air
time. If you’re yelling at the top of your
voice 90 percent of the time or your
partner is shouting at you for majority
of the fight, it isn’t fair.
2.Criticise constructively
Always deliver points that will
eventually help build a stronger
relationship. In a fight, we often get
carried away by emotions and there’s
little room left for constructive thinking.
In such moments, remind yourself that
the argument is only one tiny event in
your important relationship and shift
your focus towards constructive
criticism.
3.Mean what you say
When we’re under pressure we often
take it out on the people we’re closest
too. So if a row is brewing and you’re
the one starting it, think whether it’s
your partner that’s really the source of
your annoyance, or is it your boss, your
bad day, or your money worries.
Before the fight gets started, take a
deep breath and wonder if you really
have something to argue about. Don't
end up saying something to your
partner that you'll regret just because
you're stressed out for some other
reason.
4.Make up afterwards
Recovery from a fight can take time –
sometimes days or even weeks –
depending on the severity of the row.
Do your bit to make a smoother
transition . And make it as soon as
possible. Let your partner know you still
love him or her despite your
differences.
Leave a note on the refrigerator or get
some flowers. A big hug is probably
even better. Or how about some racy
sex? Making up after a fight is essential
to return to normality.
DONT...
1.Get abusive
Never get physically or emotionally
abusive with your partner while arguing.
If you hit your partner, they might give
in but only because they are scared or
frightened.
And don’t get into name-calling. By
putting your partner into a stereotype,
you only end up angering and hurting
them. Think how you would feel if your
partner did the same to you? Also, if
you continue telling your partner that
they are, let’s say, “good-for-nothing,”
not only will they start behaving in a
way that they fit into that stereotype,
the fear is that you could start believing
it too.
2.Make threats
At all costs avoid making emotional
threats like, “If you leave me, I will hurt
myself,” or “If you carry on like this, it's
over.” This will just force your partner
into a corner and leave matters
unresolved.
Of course, you or your partner might
really think you've reached the end of
the line. This doesn't call for wild
threats, but serious talk and respect for
the other person's view - even if it
breaks your heart.
3.Stone-wall
Don’t evade answers to important
questions. Don’t avoid discussions ,
arguments or conflicts fearing the
outcome. Learn how to tackle them
maturely using the above tips and stop
running away from fights. If you don’t
involve yourself in a discussion, it could
leave your partner dissatisfied and
result in an unhappy relationship.
4.Go to sleep on an argument
Finally, it’s an old cliché, but you’ll feel
much better if you manage to make up
before bedtime, even if you haven’t
settled your differences.
What’s more there’s even science to
back it up. Sleep researchers
discovered that bad emotional
experiences get worse in your memory
if you go to sleep before you’ve got
back into a better mood. So push
yourself to snap out of the sulk and
reach out for that cuddle!
Do you know other Dos/Don'ts in a relationship fight? Add them to the list by commenting below
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