There is one social faux pas that quite a
number of Nairobians can't quite get a hang on:
revealing weird or intimate details to strangers.
Some of us do not even realize that we do it
every single day through social media. It
happens in real life too. I recently changed
hairdressers and as with my last hairdresser, at
the end of the session I knew her entire life
story.
I do not know what it is about hair dressers and
their penchant to overshare personal details
about their lives.
In this case, my hairdresser was not holding
anything back. She disclosed about her tough
upbringing, early pregnancy, suicide attempt,
troubled marriage, financial difficulties and
health issues. I tried to be empathetic but all I
could think was 'I do not need to know that'. It
was a huge breach in etiquette on her part
because she was making me uncomfortable.
She may have thought she was establishing a
good rapport between us by divulging all those
private details but in actual sense she freaked
me out.
When you decide to let strangers in on your
personal life, you risk scaring them away. You
think that your huge Facebook following will find
it cute and funny when you tell them about your
sexual escapades in excruciating details or
describing how you vomited after a drinking
spree, detailing the contents of the vomit.
People are repulsed by such kind of things and
will start looking at you differently.
While it is encouraged to let people see the real
you, do not unleash your crazy all at once. Let
that person get to know you gradually.
There is such a thing as 'too much
information'. There are things that the
seemingly friendly girl sitting next to you on the
bus does not need to know about you at this
stage. Even if she seems interested in a
conversation, keep it light and simple.It might
not be often that someone seems interested in
hearing about your life but resist the urge to
overshare.
There is nothing wrong with exposing yourself
emotionally but try to do it with people who
know you personally. Do not pour out your
troubles to just anyone who will listen. Maybe
we are being influenced by TV and radio talk
shows where people regularly on narrate
intimate and often humiliating details about
themselves to millions.
The good news is, unlike me, you don't have to
just sit there and listen to a stranger go on and
on about things you really have no business
knowing. The next time someone tries to unload
their childhood traumas on you, politely say 'I
am sorry but I don't know you and I do not need
to hear about that".
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